Neighborhood Bullies

Ever have neighborhood children trespassing upon your sacred property? Have you been forced to take precious time out of your Castle Day (It’s a Castle fan thing.) to explain to the parents of these same little street urchins that parenting is not to be taken lightly?

Being required by insurance liability issues to speak to each child’s parent is not my idea of fun. I did what was required to avoid insurance issues and what I hoped would benefit the children. These kids are basically nice kids but not yet old enough to comprehend actions which might compromise their own safety. Lucky me, I am now the “neighborhood bully”.

So, what can one do when parents don’t seem to comprehend the all-encompassing responsibilities of parenthood? That being omniscient in the knowledge of the whereabouts of a child is essential to the health and safety of their child? That simply because one neighbor allows them to play in her yard does not give them Carte Blanche over the entire community? Install a basic and inexpensive child warning system.

Constructing a Child Warning System
I decided a megaphone would do the job. My voice was getting hoarse attempting to communicate with children whenever I saw them attempting some life-ending snow boarding trick.

The bullhorn is sufficiently loud enough to avoid larynx damage. Some come with bells and whistles. Mine does. It also plays an annoying version of “The Saints Go Marching In”. It has a siren for those brave enough to pretend they are cops. I just needed something to avoid wading through half a foot of snow to “talk” to the kids and remind them for the millionth time to play in their own yard.

Sadly, I’ve only been able to use it one time. Apparently, once was enough. I guess I’ll need to find an activity which requires the use of a megaphone. Maybe a coaching position. Happily one family is moving on to greener pastures and a larger house and yard. So, all is well that ends well.



  1. Kids these days have not been taught old fashioned respect. Unless it is known they are allowed to trample in someone’s yard or yours…they should stay off. I taught my kids that. Same reason you see kids climbing all over everything at stores. No respect. Kids need direction from their parents. Not saying all kids are like this..but a lot are. My teenagers are not perfect, but I have taught them about respect! Hope things get better!


    • Thank you for your thoughts. Writing is a good way of burning of steam. Less trouble with the neighbors. February was extremely cold especially towards the end. This alleviated much of the neighbor kids’ gallivanting heedlessly through yards not belonging to their family. With the snow melting will come new challenges of enforcing my right as owner to determine who may or may not be permitted to enjoy the soft green grass and beautiful shady trees surrounding my humble abode. My megaphone is primed for action should duty call.


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